Marissa read this blog post  http://thebloggess.com/2011/06/and-thats-why-you-should-learn-to-pick-your-battles/

and immediately sent me the post to read telling me it was just like her and me.  I almost laughed so hard when I read it I knew that I would have to get Marissa a Beyonce of her own so that whenever she was having a bad day she could always remember the story of Beyonce.  Beyonce now resides on her kitchen window sill. 

This is the story of the original Beyonce. (I did some editing of the post)

This morning I had a fight with Victor about towels. I can’t tell you the details because it wasn’t interesting enough to document at the time, but it was basically me telling Victor I needed to buy new bath towels, and Victor insisting that I NOT buy towels because I “just bought new towels“. Then I pointed out that the last towels I’d bought were hot pink beach towels, and he was all “EXACTLY” and then I hit my head against the wall for an hour.

Then Laura came to pick me up so we could go to the discount outlet together, and as Victor gave me a kiss goodbye he lovingly whispered, “You are not allowed to bring any more goshdarn towels in this house or I will strangle you“. And that was exactly what I was still echoing through my head an hour later, when Laura and I stopped our shopping carts and stared up in confused, silent awe at a display of enormous metal chickens, made from rusted oil drums.

Laura: I think you need one of those.
me: You’re joking, but they’re kind of horrifically awesome.
Laura: I’m not joking. We need to buy you one.
me: The 5-foot tall one was $300, marked down to $100. That’s like, $200 worth of chicken for free.
Laura: You’d be crazy not to buy that. I mean, look at it. IT’S FULL OF WHIMSY.
me: Victor’d be pissed.

Laura: Yup.
me: But on the plus side? It’s not towels.
Laura: Yup.

me: We will name him Henry. Or Charlie. Or O’Shannesy.
Laura: Or Beyoncé.

me: Or Beyoncé. Yes. And when our friends are sad we can leave him at their front door to cheer them up.

Laura: Exactly. It’ll be like, “You thought *yesterday* was bad? Well, now you have a enormous metal chicken to deal with. Perspective. Now you have it.”
Then we flagged down a salesman, and we were all “What can you tell us about these chickens?”, as if we were in an art gallery, and not in a store that specializes in last years’ bathmats. He didn’t know anything about them, but he said that they’d only only sold one and it was to a really drunk lady, and then Laura and I were all “SOLD. All this chicken belongs to us now.”

So he loaded it onto a trolley, but Beyoncé was surprisingly unstable, and the giant 5 foot metal chicken crashed over onto the floor. And Laura and I were all “CHICKEN DOWN! CLEAN-UP IN AISLE 3″ but he didn’t laugh. Then the manager came to see what was causing all the commotion, and that’s when he found the very-conservative salesman unhappily struggling to right an enthusiastically pointy chicken which was almost as tall as he was. The salesman was having a hard time, and he told everyone to stand back “because this chicken will cut you“, and at first I thought he meant it as a threat, like “That chicken has a shiv”, but turns out he just meant that all the chickens’ ends were sharp and rusty. It was awesome, and Laura and I agreed that even if we got tetanus, this chicken had already paid for himself even before we got it in her truck.

Then we got to my house and quietly snuck the chicken up to my front door, rang the doorbell, and hid around the corner.

Victor opened the door and looked at the chicken in stunned silence for about 3 seconds. Then he sighed, closed the door and walked away.

Laura: What the f***? That’s it? That’s the only reaction we get?

me: That’s it. He’s a hard man to rattle.

Victor was surprisingly pissed that I’d “wasted money” on an enormous chicken, because apparently he couldn’t appreciate the hysterical value of a 5 foot chicken ringing the doorbell. Then I said, “Well, at least it’s not towels” and apparently that was the wrong thing to say because that’s when Victor screamed and stormed off, but I knew he was locked in his office because I could hear him punching things in there. Then I yelled through his door, “It’s an anniversary gift for you, a$$hole. Two whole weeks early. 15 YEARS IS BIG METAL CHICKENS.”

Then he yelled that he wanted it gone, but I couldn’t move it myself, so instead I said okay and went to watch tv. Then when the UPS guy came I hid, but he was all “Dude. Nice chicken” and Victor yelled, “IT IS NOT A NICE CHICKEN”. Which was probably very confusing to the UPS guy, who was just trying to be polite, Victor. Victor seemed more disgruntled than usual, so I finally dragged the chicken into the backyard and wedged it into a clump of trees so that it could scare the snakes away. Then I came in and Victor angrily pulled me into his office so that I could see that I’d stationed Beyoncé directly in front of his only window. And I was all “Exactly. YOU’RE WELCOME.” I told him that he could move Beyoncé if he wanted to, but he totally hasn’t. Probably because of all of the giant rocks I piled on Beyonce’s feet to dissuade burglars. Or possibly because Beyoncé is growing on him. Still, I can’t help but think that we wouldn’t even be having this argument if Beyoncé was towels. Honestly, this whole chicken is really a lesson in picking your battles more carefully. Plus, he’s awesome and I can’t stop giggling every time I look at him. Beyoncé, that is.

80's night

For my friend Erin's birthday we all celebrated by dressing up 80's style and going bowling!  I never really enjoyed dressing up but this was way fun.  You will not believe how easy it was to find 80's stuff.  I just had to shop in the juniors section!  Yes it's a little too small but oh well.   I didn't bowl but I did hang out with some awesome girls that night!

 JoLynn and I

 Marissa and I

 Me, Brooke, and the birthday girl, Erin

 Me, Brooke, and Cathie

 Back row: Me, April, Marissa, Erin, Cathie, Bobbi

Front row: Jessica and Jolynn

Check out these fabulous leg warmers!  Yep we even found leg warmers!

Marissa, Erin, and I made a pact to wear the leg warmers the following Sunday to church.  Marissa wore them under her very long skirt so you couldn't see them at all.  Erin forgot hers (luckily I had an extra pair with me just in case something like that happened).   I was the only one who wore my leg warmers proudly.  My big girls were embarrassed for me.

Goodbye 2011! Welcome 2-0-1-2!!!!

We didn't do anything super special to welcome in the new year.  We rented movies (xmen and super 8) and ate cream puff and had some sparkling cider.  Nate had to go into work at 10 p.m. that night.  Tyler and Natalie were exhausted from staying up late the night before and begged to go to bed early but neither one of them wanted to actually go to bed early.  At midnight the kids banged pot and pans and watched fireworks from the window (it was so blasted cold outside).  I gave them all a kiss goodnight and we headed to bed.  Because I couldn't kiss my sweetie at midnight I sent him a picture of my kisses!  Lucky him right?  Happy New Year!  I hope 2012 is as kind to us as 2011 was!

Going Sledding

The day after Christmas we have a fun tradition of going to stores and taking advantage of their clearance items.  We got early and went headed out the door to Target.  There wasn't much there that we wanted  to get.  But my favorite thing to get there is the different flavored hot chocolates.  Yummers!  I ended up finding some of those and getting some half price wrapping paper and Christmas bags.  We also were planning on heading to Old Navy.  Nichole had received a gift card and she wanted to go there.  But, as we were heading out of the target parking lot we got a phone call from The Fishers and they asked us if we wanted to go sledding.  We asked Nichole which she would rather do.  She chose sledding.  We hurried home and got all ready for sledding.  All I can say is that all of the winter gear we invested in was worth every penny.  We had bought 2 sleds earlier this year.  They were rather tricky.  You had to put all of your weight in the front or it would tip over.  It took some trial and error to figure that one out which was fun to watch.  But everyone got the hang of it.  I even hiked to the top of the hill and went down.  Nichole went on back with me.  When we started going we were going so slow and then I thought lean forward.  Then we started going really fast down the hill.  The sled turned and started going sideways into fresh powder.  The stuff kicked up in my face and I had to keep my eyes closed because I couldn't see a thing with all of the snow going right into my face.  When we stopped I a good size snowball of snow on my face.  Brrrrr it was cold!  The little kids got to experience a dog sled ride too.  Pretzel pulled the little kids all over the place on the sled.  By the end Pretzel was pooped but she had fun.  We all did.

Ella likes to go to the top of the pile of snow that has been plowed in the middle of our parking lot.

It's Christmas time!

This Christmas season was so much better then last years.  Of course last years was spent in a house without anything in it.  Although it was nice to have that simplicity that comes with all of your stuff in storage I enjoyed this one so much better.  It is easier to cook a meal when you have all of the pans you need.  Anyway I regress. This Christmas season started off with my favorite activity baking cookies.  I baked them with my friends Julieanne, Marissa, and Erin.  Unfortunately non of those cookies lasted very long at my house (the kids ate them ALL!) I made a whole new batch of cookies.  I made ginger cookies with white chocolate chips in the middle, lime cookies, cherry chocolate cookies, snickerdoodles, baklava, white chocolate popcorn, indoor smores, peppermint cakeballs, lemon cookie balls, and white chocolate dipped candy canes. Yummy!  It was a huge undertaking and I loved every moment of it.  For family home evening we took them around to our friends in the ward.  I took some to my Physical Therapist's office and to my podiatrists office.  I now recognize the fact that that is not a common practice or I should say it is not a common practice when you are younger then 65.  I told my friend about it and she reassured me that some of the people her husband works with  (her husband is a dr) received cookies from their patients but that they were all much older then I.  I told her that I went in to pick up my orthotics from my podiatrist and dropped them off which in turn started another old lady laughing fit from her.  Love you Lesley!  I attended many concerts ( 2 for Nichole and her choir class and 1 from Natalie for band) and 1 class party (for Ella's class.  Tyler didn't have one). I also attended a ugly sweater party (as previously posted) and The ward Christmas party.  I have been one busy lady.

 Tyler is the second kid in on the left in the back row.  Ella is in the back row too although very, very hard to see.

Ella has been fighting with her belief in Santa this year.  She had been told many times by kids at school that there was no such thing as Santa.  I assured her that the real Santa would be at the ward Christmas party.  She was so excited to sit on his lap and was loving life until she saw "Santa" walking out of the church building in normal clothes and not his Santa costume.  She came up to me furious and yelled at me about seeing him leave and took off down the hallway.   I sat and talked to her about it.  She turned to me and said "Mom look me in the eyes.  I want you to tell me the truth, is there such thing as Santa"?  How do you respond to that.  I told her that there wasn't.  She truly did not want to know (she told me that later) but she was very mad at me for lying to her all of these years.  All f my other kids reacted much differently when they found out.  Later that night when she was in bed I heard her crying.  I asked her what was wrong.  She proceeded to tell me that she was sad that there wasn't any Santa and that we lied to her for so long. I asked her if she would of us tell her the truth about Santa  and her not have as much fun all of these Christmas'?  She told me yes.  Mind you I don't think I was in the wrong and I don't tend to lie to my kids very often but man it's Santa!  I loved Santa and never felt betrayed by my parents for making the Christmas season fun for me by telling me there was a Santa.  I told her that I felt bad for lying to her but I was also sad because a little bit of the fun of Christmas is gone for me forever because my baby doesn't believe anymore.   She told me that it was ok that when I have grand kids that I can lie to them about Santa too.  Thanks Ella.
Several days after finding out she would still cry about it and was upset.  I was beyond caring anymore and told her that if she keeps it up then she isn't going to receive any Santa presents at all.  She stopped.

For Christmas Eve this year we did things a bit different.  We went over to our friends The Fisher's house foe dinner.  We played some games and then went up to the tower to look for Santa.   Natalie ended up going home early because she wasn't feeling well.

Then we came home and opened our Christmas Eve jammies and watched our Christmas movie.  This year we watched Elf.  Then the kids set out their chairs where Santa would bring their presents.  They also set out their stocking, Christmas cereal, and fruit.

 I made the kids Christmas jammies this year.  It was a lot of fun.

 This is Natalie's chair.  She got from Santa, Just Dance 3, Scriptures and $100 for her Boston Trip.  From Mom and Dad she got an outfit, book and boots.

This is Nichole's chair she got from Santa, scriptures, and ipod and gift certificates.  From mom and dad she got clothes, boots and a book.

 This is Ella's chair from Santa she got a camera, a mp3 player and an Easy bake oven.  From mom and dad she got clothes, a book, and martial arts lessons.

This is Tyler's chair.  From Santa he got 2 wii games, and scriptures.  From mom and dad he got clothes, a hiking backpack and martial arts classes.

 The kids had to wait extra long this year to see what they got because  I was setting up Skype so that my family could watch us open up presents.  It was fun to feel like they could be a part of Christmas morning.

For church that morning they combines the two wards that go to our building and held 1 hour church at 10:00.  It was nice to have that extra reminder of why we celebrate Christmas.

 I got this apron from my friend Mindy for Christmas.

 You are never too old to play in the boxes your gifts come in.

I had a wonderful Christmas I hope you all did too!